Meeting Other Guys Who Are In The Closet

Hey everyone

It's been aaages since I've posted but I've got some time now so let's get another one off the press! I'm going to try and do the blog more frequently now as I do love writing and find it quite therapeutic - also I like the feedback and people's comments on what I write, it can be interesting to share.

So I've met a few other closeted guys when out and about, some are very blatant and upfront about their situation, others are more suspect...here are a few of my experiences and thoughts:

Closet!

Married Guy

Once I met a guy in a bar and after he got me a drink he started talking about how he was down here for work for a bit and away from his wife - I knew that him owning up to it straight away pretty much meant he was looking for some fun, but I didn't want to waste his time so I guzzled the drink and got out of there! But funnily enough that's happened a couple times - I don't know why they would be so upfront about it after meeting me for 10 seconds, I guess its because they probably wont be around gay bars again anytime soon and want action (which no doubt they have starved themselves of for aaages) ASAP. He seemed like an average nice guy and I remeber thinking he looked a little nervous which was actually a bit cute, lol, mind you he was a little bit over my age range but I seem to attract all sorts and like variety so I won;t complain about getting the interest...although it was a slow night that night in the bar and he might have hit on anything with a pulse so I won't read too much into it just yet...


Six pack in the closet

I remember a time when  I met a guy who was closeted and we "hung out" for a little bit, I took his number and text him the next day but I never heard anything back - he was an awesome and really hot guy with a crazy fit body, but I realised he would never see me again as, looking back on it, I could tell he wouldn't want to allow someone to get that close to him who is a guy - It's a real shame as I suspect he wants to but can't because of where he is from and his situation (which, again, he spoke of quite candidly) - but instead of me realising he just wanted a brief thing I was taken in by the compliments and charm and niaively thought we might see each other again...silly me I guess. He was a little shorter than me, had some stubble and was Mediterranean I think - I hate it when guys want your number and then don't text you back! It was this meet which has made me a lot more careful about who I give it to.

Ye Olde Charmer

Another time was when I first hit this spot in London - this was during the very early days on me going to bars and think I'd only been to one or two before this occasion - but anyway I was there on my own and sat down with my drink next to some other guys. I think, if I remember correctly, that I saw a magazine open on the table and started to read it. One of the guys asked something about the magazine and we got talking. Turns out he lived abroad (not far at all though...) but worked even further away on another continent (I'm being so vague here but ya never know who's reading!!!). Anyhow, turns out he thought I was a rentboy, lol. I said I wasn't and he asked what I was doing in there by myself chatting to him then! I laughed and we just chatted a bit more. He said he was popping out to get some more cash (I guess because he didn't want to use his card in a gay venue) and I was comfy enough there and couldn;t be bothered to go anywhere else. He soon returned and asked about the rentboy thing again - I said no and I think he was testing the water to see if I would be interested but I would obviously never be - he soon realised and we just talked some more before I left - he said before I went that he didnt mean to offend and it was just that he's stopping over in london for a bit and wanted some action whilst he was here - he also fessed up to being married and my guess was that he had a couple kids aswell. Really nice guy and hope wherever he is he's doing OK.

gay love

The closet is not an easy place for anyone to be, and I don't think I'll be in it too much longer. I remember talking to one guy my age a year or two ago who said he would never date a closeted guy - he would have to come out or the guy wouldn't date him - when I first heard this I thought that was really harsh and thought the guy lacked empathy and understanding, but I think I've since realised that I might not date a closet case either once I'm out - because if I've taken the gamble and come out and have started to finally enjoy my life to the full, why would I want to start hiding part of it again - although I guess it would depend on the guy...

Nothing is ever black and white is it?!?!?!?!

Maybe one day things will be simple...but mind you simple is boooring ;-)

GayLadForLife